Lies

*This post was accepted as an honorary mention.

I shattered the mirror and you didn’t even notice. That’s probably where it all went wrong.

You told me that we were mad. You were right.

You looked empyrean in the moonlight, enveloped by the black sky glittering with stars.

Your smile splintered my heart because it made you look pure,

Even though you weren't.

I studied you until you blurred out of focus.

I wrote about you until my fingers began to ache.

I held you until you collapsed in my arms.

But the fairy tales lied to me

Like I lied to you.

You invaded my every word, every thought, every fantasy.

You made me feel wrecked and whole at the same time. It hurt.

But not as much as when I hurt you.

The truth was I didn’t want you. Not like I should have.

It was too hard. You made everything hard.

But then you would whisper soothing nonsense and make me feel like we could get better.

Nothing got better.

I told you that you were the most beautiful creature I had ever seen.

You thought I was a liar.

I am a liar.

I told you, “Let’s run away together.

You and me. Alone.

Forever.”

You were all I needed anyway.

I wanted to live in a castle light years from civilization:

Empty halls, high ceilings, crystal chandeliers.

“Would you like that? I certainly would.”

Wishful thinking.

How many rooms? We could have counted them all, hand in hand.

We would wake to blissful darkness, curtains drawn over the windows.

You hated sunlight,

But you loved me.

Actually, you didn’t.

I just didn’t know that.

We could have been perfect

But you died.

I suppose it was partially my fault,

Because you never existed.